Post-postpartum Revelations

I never realized the impact my postpartum depression had on the friendships around me until I finally broke out and just let it all out. I had expected people to shut down on me. I expected people to tell me to quit my bitching. What I didn’t expect was the complete compassion that filled my email inbox and text messages of people offering their support and understanding.

“If only I had known!!” Crystal stared across the table at me while we sipped our wine. We had both left our kids, my three and her four, with our husbands so we could get out of the house and enjoy just being ourselves for a while. No noses to wipe or diapers to change. Just two girls enjoying their afternoon.

We sat in the corner of the local winery, totally engrossed in our conversations. With her own four kids, Crystal knew exactly what I had struggled through. She’d been there. She understood. She listened and nodded along as I detailed out every issue I had been fighting for months.

“I get it, Kirsten. I completely get it.” With those small words, I quickly grabbed my napkin to dab at the tears falling down my face.

As I poured my heart out to her, I wondered, would things have ever gotten that bad if I had just taken the time to open up about what I was going through? If I had just reached out to say I needed help, would I have been dealing with the depression for an entire year?

Looking across the table at Crystal’s compassionate eyes, I was sure I had all the support I needed. All I had to do was ask.

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