You Can’t Always Just Fix it…

One of the hardest lessons I have learned am still learning, not only as a parent, but as a husband is you can’t always fix the problems. The best thing you can do is listen, let them get things off their chest. Even if you think you know the answers, just keep them to yourself. Sometimes people just need someone to hear their frustrations so they don’t feel alone. I’ve struggled with this for much of my life. I’m a fixer, could be because I’m male, Sagittarius, or even that my name means healer. For whatever reason, I am constantly trying to fix the problems my family brings to me. What is that really teaching my children though? Run to Daddy, he’ll make it better. Lately I’ve been trying to give my boys more freedom, but with it comes more responsibility for their own actions or inactions. I think I’ve said to Ethan about 100 times. “Well what’s the solution.” He generally already knows that answer himself and doesn’t need me, he just needs more confidence in himself.

I’ve hard the hardest time when it comes to Kirsten, nothing hurts my heart worse than to see my wife frustrated and crying over something I have absolutely no control. It literally drives me insane, but I can’t let it. It won’t help her work through things if I’m acting mad and frustrated, too. Not to give away my secrets, but I’ve found that if I listen and ask questions instead of over solutions she work through at least the emotions, if not a possible solution for her problems.

You can’t always just fix it… but you can always be there to listen when they want to talk.

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